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TA Away Game Travel Guide to Montreal

04/23/2012 12:53 PM | 107ist Admin (Administrator)

—by Andrew Brawley

I’m just gonna start by stating the obvious: I’m not a fan of Montreal. I don’t mean the team. I mean the city. I’ve been there twice, and each time sucked. The closest I’ve ever come to a legit fist-fight was in this town. I’m not sure what the deal is, but Montreal and I are 0 for 2. In fact, I can pretty much do without most of the entire province of Québec. A famous insult comic and I share the same opinion on this issue.

Because of this unfortunate situation, I’ve deferred all input for this travel guide to someone who knows the city well. He’s Canadian. He speaks French (as most Canadians do, thanks to socialist education and dual-language laws). While born in Vancouver, he spent many years (including the formative college ones) back east among the Québécois. Oh yeah, he produced a few records you might’ve heard.

Here’s punk rock producer superstar Steve Kravac’s guide to Montreal.

 

Best dive bar: St-Laurent Bifteck

This is the formerly-punk-rock-now-hipster hangout on what we call “the main,” or St. Laurent Street. Always cheap. Be sure to try a pitcher of the local (not so micro) brew Boreale. It's a mainly English speaking hang.

Best Smoked Meat Sandwiches: Schwartz’s Montreal Hebrew Delicatessen

The smoked meat on rye sandwich is the cornerstone of Montreal dining. Schwartz's deli serves the quintessential version. Celine Dion is buying the place. Hopefully she leaves everything as is and goes back to Vegas.

Best Cheap Breakfast: Dusty’s

Dusty's serves up the amazing breakfast and the fresh squeezed orange juice is awesome. Love the home fries! Perfect to nurse your hangover.

Best Bagel: St-Viateur Bagel

Bagels fresh from a wood fired oven 24 hours a day, 7 days week. What could be better? These may be the best in North America.


Comments

  • 07/14/2016 11:06 PM | 107ist Admin (Administrator)
    MTL says:
    Monday, April 23, 2012 at 11:33 am

    F*ck you Portland.
    Link  •  Reply
  • 07/14/2016 11:06 PM | 107ist Admin (Administrator)
    Andrew Brawley says:
    Monday, April 23, 2012 at 11:56 am

    Point proven.
    Link  •  Reply
  • 07/14/2016 11:06 PM | 107ist Admin (Administrator)
    PDX_Fly says:
    Wednesday, April 25, 2012 at 10:26 am

    MTL, don’t you me; Le F*ck ye? Uppity Frogs!
    Link  •  Reply
  • 07/14/2016 11:07 PM | 107ist Admin (Administrator)
    Sarah Noble says:
    Monday, April 23, 2012 at 11:41 pm

    St. Viateur’s bagels are the best I have ever had, anywhere. It would be a mortal sin to go to Montreal and not eat them.
    Link  •  Reply
  • 07/14/2016 11:07 PM | 107ist Admin (Administrator)
    KM says:
    Saturday, April 28, 2012 at 5:29 pm

    This is late, but for future reference Dusty’s has been closed due to fire since January. Likely a permanent closure.
    Link  •  Reply
  • 07/14/2016 11:07 PM | 107ist Admin (Administrator)
    MS says:
    Sunday, April 29, 2012 at 5:41 am

    I am from Montreal. I am very sorry you did not enjoy your stays in Montreal, and that you build on this experience to publish a travel guide for Timbers fans; you won’t get much interest from your guys if you start off with such a negative perspective. Also, if you share Conan’s racist views on Quebec and Montreal, perhaps this is obvious in your face when you walked our streets and ran into Québécois people – see, we can sense it when somebody does not like us, especially if these reasons are baloney (these Canadians believe in health care and equality? what morons!). Its very unfortunate because Montreal has the hottest women, and the nicest people. Please come back one more time, but don’t listen to Conan before and please do try to open your mind. :-)
    Link  •  Reply
  • 07/14/2016 11:08 PM | 107ist Admin (Administrator)
    Andrew Brawley says:
    Sunday, April 29, 2012 at 8:51 am

    MS, while I appreciate your reply, please know that I am simply relaying my personal experiences, even acknowledging that it’s possible that not everyone shares those same feelings. Also, last time I checked, the Québécois were a nationality, and not a race. What Conan did might be considered offensive by some, but it was not racist in any way. It’s responses like yours that promote the fact that maybe the Québécois could use a sense of humor. Your fellow Canadians seem to have one.
    Link  •  Reply
  • 07/14/2016 11:08 PM | 107ist Admin (Administrator)
    MS says:
    Sunday, April 29, 2012 at 2:23 pm

    The Québécois have a huge sense of humour – we are the inventors of the Just for Laughs festival, which led, among others, Jerry Seinfeld and Jay Leno to stardom. Even if Conan is essentially insignificant in terms of cultural influence, I actually do find his gig offensive, racist, but hilarious, because he pokes fun at our own issues and problems. However, one cannot use this kind of stuff to actually build a true awareness of a people. No, we do not form a race (races don’t exist), but one can still be racist towards Italians or Jews or Americans, even if these are not races – so, I can rephrase racist as ethnocentric if you like. “Responses like mine?” – you do not even know who I am, nor what my background is. What bugs me most is your dismissal of an entire culture with this “socialist” label, as if caring for other people is a bad thing. Its comments like these (to use your own words I guess), and such words as “Canuckistan” which I have seen elsewhere, that really make me realize how much some Americans do not understand any other culture, society or country, no want to, considering how supreme you think you are. I came about your blog because I saw some Timber Army people on the sports news yesterday (I wanted to know what the Timber Army was – never heard of it before) – it was nice to see so many if you guys in the Olympic Stadium – I hope they enjoyed their trip.
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  • 07/14/2016 11:09 PM | 107ist Admin (Administrator)
    Andrew Brawley says:
    Sunday, April 29, 2012 at 2:36 pm

    MS, by your logic, I hereby hold all Québécois responsible for introducing the world to Jay Leno. I expect an apology on your next post.
    Link  •  Reply
  • 07/14/2016 11:09 PM | 107ist Admin (Administrator)
    MS says:
    Sunday, April 29, 2012 at 3:10 pm

    I’m sorry – he does have nice cars tough…
    Link  •  Reply
  • 07/14/2016 11:09 PM | 107ist Admin (Administrator)
    Link  •  Reply
  • 07/14/2016 11:10 PM | 107ist Admin (Administrator)
    Andrew Brawley says:
    Sunday, April 29, 2012 at 3:24 pm

    Thank you. Jealous? If you’re gonna get all stalkerish on me, that’s fine. Just remember that it’s a two-way street, and I have access to your email address, plus your IP address.
    Link  •  Reply
  • 07/14/2016 11:10 PM | 107ist Admin (Administrator)
    MS says:
    Sunday, April 29, 2012 at 3:29 pm

    oh no- not being stalkerish – just taught the pic was really really small – wanted to see if I could find a bigger one – I also found hundreds of other Timber army people, all with similar axes. I guess the theme now – timber, forests, axes, army – if you come to Quebec a third time, I will show you around, and you will love it I assure you.
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